The weight of unspoken hopes
She told herself she was moving on. Over and over again, she whispered it like a prayer, hoping that someday, she would believe it. But how do you move on when the person you're trying to forget is still in your life? When his voice is the first thing that brings you comfort and the last thing that keeps you trapped?
It wasn’t fair.
He cared—God, he cared so much. He’d check in on her, encourage her, push her to be better. And every word of kindness was a knife to her chest. Because he didn’t love her. Not in the way she wanted. And the cruelest part? He knew. He knew what he had done. He knew the way he had let her down, the way he had shattered something fragile inside her.
But he still spoke to her like nothing had happened. Like she wasn’t breaking inside every time he smiled, every time he existed so effortlessly in a world where she was struggling just to breathe without him.
She hated how easy it was for him. How he could go a day without talking to her, while she felt like she was drowning in the silence he left behind. It wasn’t fair. None of it was.
And yet, she wanted him to stay. Even if it hurt. Even if it left her stuck in an endless cycle of hoping, breaking, and pretending to be fine. Because losing him entirely? That felt like something she wouldn’t survive.
She has so much potential. she just doesn't know how to use it, where to even begin with. she knows she doesn't belong here. but there she still is
Maybe one day, she’d finally let go. But today wasn’t that day.